Continued from Weight Redn - 6!!!

Brief : I am 84 & want to get married. I need to slim down and try jogging.Not as easy as blogging and soon loose hope. Visit Bengali Baba and with his "blessings" am able to resume jogging. After 6 months of ferocious jogging minus good food , I think I have achieved golden glory ( and can now marry golden lady!!!  But doc disappoints me saying I am still 84.However the weight machine I am standing on says 74. I am dead confused. Aur ab aage....

Exactly six months ago, it was 84. And 84 minus 74 is 10. I had lost 10 kgs. but doc says - NO WEIGHT LOSS. And .....

THE HIDDEN SURPRISE:

as my face turned into a big question mark....the doc’s room was filled with a great laughter.

Surely something was wrong with me.

Either my ears were deceiving me or I needed to register myself in a mental hospital.

I looked around.
Not only was the doc laughing but hey...my mom , dad and what the hell... even both of my grandparents were chuckling with smiles written over their faces.

Just as I was about to drop dead due to surprise, shock and over-confusion all rolled into one, the doc spoke, “Well, Rahul, lemme explain you the whole stuff. Promise me two things. Don’t interrupt me and answer honestly all questions that I ask you.”

“Well, I will try but not promise”, I replied.

The following conversation followed-
(D for Doc, M for Me)

D - You know few months ago Greg Chappel had complaints about Ganguly...

M - Well, the whole India knows.... but whatz that gotta do ...

D - What did Chappel do ?

M - He shot an email to BCCI guys which leaked.but howz that related to .....

D - Exactly. So he communicated to the right people.

M - But...how the hell thats connected to me???

D - Similarly your parents communicated some complaints about you to me.

M - What complaints?

D - That you are a lazy guy ... very lethargic... not at all active in home.

M - Ok Ok Ok .. what next ?

D - That you do nothing after coming from office. Just eat , sleep and watch TV. Now are these true?

M - Well , ....... yes ........ but.....

D - No ifs and buts.....your parents wanted to change your lifestyle and they wanted me to play a crucial role.

M - .............

D - So I promised ..by hook or crook I will make you physically active. And I very well knew that it was never possible by hook. So I used the crook.

M - What ?

D - Well you see .. just like Ketan Parekh manipulated share prices, I kind of manipulated your weight.

M - What ?

D - Well on the first day , just before you walked in .. I made an “arrangement” in the machine by which it showed 10 kgs more weight than its actual .

  So when I told you that you were 84, you were actually 74 and by all means quite a fit person, both physically and mentally.

Not like Ganguly as per Chappel’s mail. And then purposefully told....actually lied that “You were not physically fit to enjoy happy married life”.

I knew for marriage’s sake, you would really awaken the tiger ( no connection with Bengal Tiger or Saurav Ganguly) within and do all that is required to trim down and...... in the process become a nice physically active person.

M - Now I get the whole point. But just a doubt, If I was 74 even six months ago, how come I am still at 74 after six months full of jogging and Karela juice and Bengali Baba’s holy ash.

D - Nice question. Look here.This is because of the concept of ‘optimum weight’.

It is that weight linked to your age and other metabolic factors which is your ideal weight and will not undergo any significant change within a given level of activity.

74 was your optimum weight and even if you did 1 hour odd jogging everyday, it has not changed.

M - Hmmm....now some things are clear.

D - But why did you go to that silly Bengali Baba. Now thats bad for a person like you....

M - Well I was kinda desperate and wanted to leave no stone unturned. But he is quite a good guy.(referring Bengali Baba), he has branches all over country and soon he plans to open a International Branch at Malaysia....

D - Havent you seen today’s news? That Bengali Baba has been arrested in Malaysia for having links to International Mafia.

I was clean bowled - lock, stock and barrel !!!!

ALL’S WELL THAT ENDS WELL:

I was not only relieved but also happy that I was quite safe and sound from the danger of being over-weight and NOW no “deewar” existed between me and my proposed marriage.

“ Hmm.. very very smart ,Sir and I have no regrets.”, I told the DOCTOR, happily.

And turning to all of my family members who were looking at me with a mischievous n fishy  look of how-we-fooled-you in their eyes, I said...

“And for all of you, Very Well Played, INDEED.
You have nearly made me a “MTV - BAKRA”, but I promise to continue this habit of daily exercise for the rest of my life, so don’t worry. But for now, I must rush.”

“For jogging?” asked the Doc.

“For eating Roshogullas?” asked my dad.

“Must be for that Karela Juice”, my Mom. (She doesn’t ask. She asserts)

“No, all - wrong. Where for but to find a suitable BAKRI for myself !!!”, I remarked.

The room was filled with a roaring laughter and believe it or not, even Socrates (our family dog) laughed on that very fine day.